This is an apology post. Well, not quite. I spent two years writing this book/magazine. When I finally declared it finished, I sent it by email to some of you. And then, being a product of the Facebook generation, I waited for feedback. And waited. And waited… impatiently. One reply came quickly, tearful and kind.…… Continue reading The Big Book Of Grief
Category: Familia
Wings, Whiskers, and Fireflies
A non-believer’s guide to signs After my mom died, maybe three or four months later, my father found a baby pigeon on the sidewalk, barely alive. He took it home and, slowly, patiently, nursed it back to life. He named it Dosoftei and kept it in the kitchen for months. When I visited that fall,…… Continue reading Wings, Whiskers, and Fireflies
The Very Short and Sad Life of The Rodenstock Eyeglasses
When the average monthly salary in Romania was around 2,500 lei, my mother bought me a pair of eyeglasses that cost 475. That was almost a fifth of a monthly income. And yet, without hesitation, she paid every little penny so I could walk out of that optical store wearing a pair of Rodenstocks, German…… Continue reading The Very Short and Sad Life of The Rodenstock Eyeglasses
The Weathermen
Once upon a time, a young family moved to Brooklyn, New York. It was meant to be temporary, just for a year. A school year. A quick detour in the grand plan of life. They had come from Staten Island, uprooting their son from the only school he had ever known and dropping him into…… Continue reading The Weathermen
The Parsley Principle
The Parsley Principle applies when there’s no real need to buy anything. The only “need” is to escape the house. Enter the parsley. “Woman, I’m going to get some parsley!” my father’s voice would boom as he stepped out the door. Or, “Fah, what do I have to buy today?” he’d shout from the hallway,…… Continue reading The Parsley Principle
My Fathers “Bomb”
The so-called “bomb” is, in fact, a spherical outdoor wooden stove-slash-grill, a reasonably priced cast-iron contraption my father bought from Walmart. Hence its enduring nickname: Grandpa’s Bomb. Over the years, many movers have raised eyebrows when we assured them, “Don’t worry about the bomb. We know how to dismantle it. We’ll put it in a…… Continue reading My Fathers “Bomb”
Total Wine & More Therapy
A Quiet Toast to the Son We Will Always Carry Another Mother’s Day Without Cosmin … I knew the level of sadness would be off the charts, so I tried to make it a little better, just a little, by buying some of my wife’s favorite beers. I know that drinking isn’t a solution, but…… Continue reading Total Wine & More Therapy
Un weekend foarte special
Weekendul meu a început joi dis de dimineață, cu o plimbare în mahala, când băieții mei cei dragi au tras de mine atât de rău încât am căzut în față și în cap. Mi-am stricat ochelarii și m-am umplut de zgârieturi și de bube. Povestea pe larg, aici, în engleză însă. Joi – Ziua 0,…… Continue reading Un weekend foarte special
So Much for a Quiet Evening
Tonight, I was rushed out on an urgent mission for some very specific ladies’ care items. “And nothing else, Stefan, don’t come home with half of the store”. On my way to the checkout, I grabbed a bottle of ice-cold sparkling wine. And, this time, nothing else. With just those two items in my cart,…… Continue reading So Much for a Quiet Evening
De la arpacaș la Busuioacă
Sâmbăta noastră a început de vineri, când mi s-a spus că “Ce-ar fi sa facem mâine o colivă pentru Pomenirea Morților”? Dar nu mai aveam arpacaș, nuci, lămâi, bomboane. Ba nu, bomboane aveam, dar tot am mai cumpărat, pentru că nu am văzut mesajul la timp. Fiind încă începător în ale mariajului, chiar și după…… Continue reading De la arpacaș la Busuioacă
Lost in translation III
Since before the New Year, I’ve been hearing about January Dry. Or Dry January. Or something like that. I didn’t pay much attention until January 7th approached: Saint John’s Day (Sfântul Ioan), a very important religious observation and celebration in Romania. So important, in fact, that Romanians typically are encouraged to take time off work…… Continue reading Lost in translation III
A Failed Christmas Facebook Experiment…
… and other considerations What’s a Grieving Parent to Do During the Holidays? With the holidays closing in, I pulled out my old Christmas uniform, a plaid Henley and a Santa hat. Remarkably, they still fit, though my spirit felt two sizes too small. Dressed for the occasion, I made my daily trip to visit…… Continue reading A Failed Christmas Facebook Experiment…
A Non-Hallmark Christmas Story
Cosmin didn’t like Christmas. He had enjoyed it a long time ago, back when he was younger and his beloved Grandma was still with us. They even attempted caroling at one point, but being Popescus, they quickly realized their limitations and ended up simply reading the words—plenty of feeling, but no singing. Last Christmas with…… Continue reading A Non-Hallmark Christmas Story
Diana Krall or the $35 Sleeping Pill
…She got right down to business, making fun of the many saguaros and other prickly plants in Phoenix (to prove, I guess, she actually knew where she was performing), sharing stories about her two sons, and making some absolutely unnecessary remarks about how hot it was outside. …
My Midlife Crisis
It started at 6:00 AM on August 6, 2009, after I drove my wife and mother-in-law to the airport for their three-week trip to the motherland. By 6:25 AM, I had my head perfectly shaved and was ready to take on the next adventure. I was considering buying a Harley or a red convertible with…… Continue reading My Midlife Crisis
An Englishman in Las Vegas: A Cultural Journey To Be
You can take a Popescu out of Romania, but you just can’t take Romania – or its old habits – out of a Popescu. So, we (Mom, Dad, Uncle, Auntie Lala, and Yours Truly) left for Vegas at 6 a.m., to beat the morning rush. Allegedly, the drive was supposed to take four and a half hours. Naturally, we made…… Continue reading An Englishman in Las Vegas: A Cultural Journey To Be
Grief Awareness Day
Today (August 30th) is National Grief Awareness Day. For me, this is called “every day”. I could write pages about grief, but if the last 18 months taught me something is that grief never ends and it’s uniquely personal. I learned to live with it, and even if sometimes I laugh or smile, it doesn’t…… Continue reading Grief Awareness Day
Dreams
Last night, I dreamed of Cosmin. It was the second dream in two years. In the first dream, he was with his ‘most beloved’ grandparents, and they were packing bags. Some bags, I didn’t know whose bags they were, maybe even mine. I was there too and I told them: “Pack only for yourselves, I’m…… Continue reading Dreams
Visuri
Azi noapte l-am visat pe Cosmin. Al doilea vis în doi ani. În primul vis, se făcea că era cu Bunicii lui ‘cei mai iubiți’, și făceau bagaje. Niște bagaje, nu știm ale cui. Poate chiar ale mele. Eram și eu acolo și le spuneam: “faceți bagaje doar pentru voi, eu nu vin.” “Nu, nu,…… Continue reading Visuri
Prima Mașină – 1998
Staten Island, 1998 Ideea principală a acestei scrisori e că mi-am luat mașină, după multă chinuială și ani mulți de așteptare și dorință, că mă simțeam ca fata aia din “Luceafărul” care tânjea ca proasta după stele(?). Sentimentul se acutiza pe fiecare zi ce trecea, după ce în România mă ofticam când o vedeam pe…… Continue reading Prima Mașină – 1998
