Nea Fane – Un Biet Român Pripășit în America / A Hapless Romanian Stuck in The US

Introducere

I’ve been told my texts are too long. I know they are.

That’s why my blog is called Nea Fane Bate Câmpii (Old Man Fane Rambles On). It’s because I write a lot and, as some say, often to no particular purpose, but since no one is forced to read, I just keep doing my thing and keep writing.

This story will, by all appearances, be a long one, even though nothing actually happened (maybe that’s why), or perhaps because I made all sorts of short videos which, of course, must be thoroughly analyzed and discussed. The videos are in Romanian, which brings a real challenge in translating them, but I’ll give it a try.

For those who want the summary, here we go. We have everything.

Option 1: the shortest version.

Breaking news:
Romanians Caught in the Apocalyptic Floods in Bulgaria

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And here is the slightly longer version (Option 2), to be read by the presenter, a real presenter, though, not me, because I’ve been told I have the perfect face for radio, and, if I appear on TV, the LED screen starts crying.

BREAKING NEWS – Coropișnița (Mole Cricket) TV

Two Romanian nationals miraculously escaped the devastating floods that hit the Bulgarian coast this afternoon. The two were in a tourist area declared a “disaster area” affected by torrential rains and extreme winds, phenomena that turned the streets into actual rivers.

Latest Update: However, new information reveals that the Romanians were actually about 20 kilometers away from the flooded area. Because their weather apps announced heavy rain and strong wind, the two decided to retreat to their camper van where, as they put it, they “gave their livers a real workout.”

Upon the arrival of the intervention teams, the Romanian tourists generously shared their personal stock of spirits in true neighborly fashion, “to give the rescuers some courage,” according to slightly tipsy witnesses.

Bulgarian authorities reported that the condition of the first-aid team members is stable, however several areas visited by the vacationing Romanians remain under a “Red Alert” for alcohol vapors.

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(Next – Chapter 2)